The ability to learn every single language no one else speaks.

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the power die if you think.

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The ability to always be fashionable late

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The power to fly but only when your eyes are closed.

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The ability to shoot a banana from your eyebrow every time you are riding on a unicycle.

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The power to be super jewish

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To have the abilities to almost be as powerful as God, but you're an existentialist.

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The power to wear shirts considerably more often than others.

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The power to breath in space

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The power to know everything in the universe but you are mute.

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The power to jizz in your pants when you eat a grape.

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the ability to spin and never feel dizzy

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The ability to breath under lava

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the power to divide by 0

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The power to have amazing sexual prowess for 24 straight hours, but only on days that you have to work overtime. This is actually true.

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The power to naturally wake up at a certain time but only if you set an alarm.

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The power to be Helen Keller at will.

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The ability to fly but, if you use it, birds start flocking around you and shitting on you.

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The power to kill yourself

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The power of trolling your self

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The power to create a real-life version of any video game character, but an equally capable evil version is also created and they can pay attention to nothing except battling endlessly with neither gaining the upper hand.

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The power to always have the exact amount of money in your pocket when buying something, but then drop and lose a dime when the money over.

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The power to fly upwards at Mach 3 speeds, indoors

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The ability to piss lightning and be able to make people dance by wiggling your monobrow

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!