the power to cure cancer after having sex with the patient but only if they have aids

thumb_up thumb_down +171

The power to be stupid reading this.

thumb_up thumb_down +83

The power to turn into a pineapple that can teleport into a persons stomach while they're eating spaghetti with meatballs that arent meatball but instead tofuballs that are flavoured as battery acid that have been poisned with pikachu pee that pikachu drank from a pond with whale corpses that died because of a pine apple that was in a persons stomach while they're eating spaghetti with meatballs that arent meatball but instead tofuballs that are flavoured as battery acid that have been poisned with pikachu pee that pikachu drank from a pond with whale corpses that died.

thumb_up thumb_down +81

power to turn into an idiot once you get a scholorship.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

The power to shoot blank bullet rounds out of your fingertips.

thumb_up thumb_down +32

The power to read someone's mind, but only if they're thinking of tacos.

thumb_up thumb_down +20

The power to have lemons spew out of the sun at will

thumb_up thumb_down -1

the ability to transport anywhere and into any situation, but you never know where

thumb_up thumb_down +38

The power to copy and paste already told jokes.

thumb_up thumb_down +31

the power to fly in space

thumb_up thumb_down +51

the power to lift anything under the weight of 2 lbs

thumb_up thumb_down +95

By the power of GREYSKULL! The color of my skull is grey.

thumb_up thumb_down +138

The power to walk as fast as a tortoise, but only when its raining..

thumb_up thumb_down +86

The power to talk and listen at the same time

thumb_up thumb_down +150

The power to convert oxygen to carbon dioxide

thumb_up thumb_down +28

the ability to walk barefooted on top of legos without pain but only as long as you don't know they're legos

thumb_up thumb_down +82

The power to have a magnetically attractive force, but only to bullets

thumb_up thumb_down +54

The power to download anything you want to 99 percent complete.

thumb_up thumb_down -41

The power to make high definition photo a hammer (with a red comfortable heated handle with LED flashing lights) appear out of thin air. (Oh, and on a 8"x11" piece of paper of course).

thumb_up thumb_down +124

The power to agree to the "Terms of Service" without actually reading them.

thumb_up thumb_down +57

The power to count exactly how many babies under the age of three weeks existed in the last 14 seconds.

thumb_up thumb_down +148

the power to only have to go to the bathroom once a year but smell like poop the whole year.

thumb_up thumb_down +89

The ability to telekinetically form crop circles in your own pubic hair.

thumb_up thumb_down +52

the power to have a combination lock, and forget the code

thumb_up thumb_down +164

Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!