The power to shoot lasers from your eyes when you eyes are closed

thumb_up thumb_down -12

To be able to cut grass to the femtometer of any desired length, but only whilst standing in the eye of a hurricane.

thumb_up thumb_down +45

The power to start time only when it's on.

thumb_up thumb_down +80

the power to permanently change your name to Graham

thumb_up thumb_down +82

The power of singing piano playing and color blindness. Moral: "The skies are orange! Blue Roses too"

thumb_up thumb_down +78

The power to turn wine into water

thumb_up thumb_down +114

The power to shrink at will, but never grow back to your normal size.

thumb_up thumb_down +109

The ability to transform into an 82 year old Hungarian woman with a weak bladder.

thumb_up thumb_down +4,155

The power to conjure chairs at will.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

the power to have no one read this post

thumb_up thumb_down +94

The power to smell a fart before someone lets it out.

thumb_up thumb_down +121

The power to use your penis and testicles as a powerful one time grenade in case you get assaulted. (probably the most pointless power ever)

thumb_up thumb_down +120

The ability to have everything you write turn into random insults in braille, but lacking the capacity to learn braille.

thumb_up thumb_down +58

The power to wait 8 to 10 business days.

thumb_up thumb_down +63

The power to turn on your Xbox without touching it but you need your controller.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

The ability to spread toe jam on toast

thumb_up thumb_down +165

the power to make stupid useless puns and not pay attention to the villian

thumb_up thumb_down +18

Power to freeze ice.

thumb_up thumb_down +180

The power to have every power, including the power that forcibly removes all of your other powers.

thumb_up thumb_down +26

The power to breath in lava, If you don't burn.

thumb_up thumb_down +56

the power to shoot superman

thumb_up thumb_down -11

The power to get the bullet every time you play russian roulette

thumb_up thumb_down +45

The power to end a sentence the way that people wasn't expecting them to orangoutang.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

the ability to taste so good it makes you wanna slap yo mama

thumb_up thumb_down +106

Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!