The man who isn't afraid of sharks. Not even a little.

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The power to walk after about 6 months of age.

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The power to look like another person, but only if the other person is uglier

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To be able to generate cancer at will

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The power to handle the truth. Moral: Truth is in the eye of the beholder, I AM THE ONE AND ONLY BEHOLDER!

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The power to remove your foreskin at any given time

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The power to be the only person who can save mankind from creatures that don't exist.

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The power to be distracted with grea

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the power to remember th...

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The power to realize that at least half of the top ten "powers" are yours, and you don't know if you are proud or ashamed of having so little to do... On the bright side, you don't sign them like some other douches...

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The power to control disabled people with your mind.

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The power to cook 3 minute noodles in under 1 minute.

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The power to read the future in a language you will never learn to understand. Moral: I read that "thy comment expects a billion red thumbs"... WTF does that mean?

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EntirelyTooManyNapkins Man

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the power to nit propely

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The powers to have super speed when you can't run anymore.

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The power to see why kids love cinnamon toast crunch

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The ability to talk to and have a conversation with boxes

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The power to accidentally make pop-up adds appear on the device you are using if you click the X on a website or add!

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the power of fart helium

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The power of being invincible, except when a life-threatening situation develops.

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The ability not cry while cutting onions, only after hearing the news that a family member has just died

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To be be able to be and throw fire without being fireproof.

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the power to only have to go to the bathroom once a year but smell like poop the whole year.

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!