The ability to fly while awake, but you are narcoleptic

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the power to remove the white seeds from a watermelon over the course of two months.

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The power to have super hearing but only works when you are dead.

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The ability to fly while on a plane. You can only do this at the same altitude and speed of the plane.

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The ability to remain entertained at the DMV

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The ability to grow and retract your hair at will, but cutting it will remove the ability.

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the power to burp every time you drink 1 litre of soda/fizzy

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The power to read the entire Twilight series withou suffering brain damage, only once you have to read all four books in the same sitting.

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The power to be able to be a guy who can create and control fire but if it touches you, you still burn

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the power to transform into a young Ethiopian school girl with one leg who can control platypuses.

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The power to push "pull" doors

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The power to speak with dead relatives, but only whilst masturbating.

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The power to always be at half mast.

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The ability to have a friend names James who dislikes all your Pointless Superpowers

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the power to turn into nothing.

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The power to have perfect vision, but only in pitch black darkness

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The power to change any font after the paper is printed. But it turns to comic sans

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The power to have sex with anyone you like except human beings. -Shandric

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the power to write on cellophane

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The power to drink alcohol without getting drunk.

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The power to wish you had a power

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the ability to change the color of one eye if dehydrated nearly to the point of death

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The helpers... early days part 3!: Shitfixer: What color is your poo? Hmm.. you should eat more vegetables.., You need someone to fix your toilet? Try calling Batman... Batman: Yes? Are you retarded? Dense or something? Of course I repair toilets and install showers! I am the goddamn Batman! The Pope: The less people use condoms, the more children we can bang! I really hope nobody finds out our secret reason for banning condoms or stuff... AMEN! Moral Man: People are gonna try crush me for the last one, they gotta find me first though... and I kill and eat Zealots (and pussy) for breakfast... and its nearly breakfast so please come by.. only 100 at the time though, I have limits too you know... although some still think I am perfect... sigh...

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Night vision that only works during the day

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!