The power to fart tear gas

The Power to Heat Food with your Mind, only when it's in a microwave.

The power to perform incredible feats of strength and speed but only while on an elevator.

The power to produce a hand vacuum from your belly button that only sucks up lint for your belly button

the power to erase pencil liines using your index finger

ur mother so ugly she gave the devil a heart attack

The power to raise your cholesterol level using only your mind.

the power to be immune to bullets only when your not getting shot at.

the power to make your nose longer by 5 centimeter on command

"man hiding at the ladies room" "woman enters" SURPRIIIIIISEEEeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeAERHG! Ok so now we know my dick fits up your ass... hi my name is... why you crying?

A book on how to solve a paradix

the power to start a new wave band with a neon Open sign, a single bath salt, and a wet Tibetan ritz cracker.

The ability to lead millions into committing mass genocide, proceeding this by killing yourself.

The power to misspell things when doing a captcha

The power to make only right turns. take THAT nascar!

The ability to abruptly end conversations.

The ability to teleport 0.00000000000000007 seconds in the past

Solar Powered Vampire Abilities

The power to be fat only when your at a party.

The power to eat toxic waste as long as it is not toxic but die from non-toxic waste and stuff

the power to give yourself sunburn

the power to only bring back the dead from june 1450

The power to predict the past.

The power to sneeze with your eyes opened.

Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!