the power to fire angry ticks out of your nipples

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The power to know everything but forget it instantly.

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I HAVE A TINY PINGAS! (Penis) Moral: Ladyfriend here daring me to post this here, PFF! Is that even a dare? I got balls of steel! Oh, and I should totally ask my doctor if she can give me something that helps me unwind after multiple female company, or at least they are daring me all to type that pff! Im not even good looking... And noooooo, nobody dared me to type that, they want todeeeeeeeeeellllllllteeeeeeeeee tht BUTI SHALLOOOWWWWWWINSSSSSSSS

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The power to deconstruct molecules, but only when they're part of an object with a volume of 1 cubic millimeter.

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The power to have every superpower ever (including pointless ones) for one second every full moon, then have every pointless one for the rest of the time.

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The power to fart through your mouth and burb through your butt

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The power to eat your left index finger, and have it regrow out of your belly button.

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the ability to run for president only if you're sarah palin

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The power to summon your mom so you can prove she's not as fat as the chav in front of you is saying she is

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the power to hate disney stars

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the power to.....................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................waste your time

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the power to blind and nausiat yourself for 12 hours straight with no way to stop it ohh and the power the eat hairy dicks

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The power to read people's mind but can only read their minds when they are thinking about sex.

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The power to erase anything written in pencil

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the power to say the power to say the power to say the power to say.....

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Zebra Man has the power to change color from black to white and back again, at will

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The power to lick your own elbow

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the power to inflate your testicles to such size, that it hurts.

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Superhuman strength and endurance but only when sleeping

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The power to never be surprised when the toaster goes off.

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the ability to increase your debts in the bank.

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The power to be AMAZING in bed, but only when you're having sex with a midget over the age of 40.

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the power to type without looking at the keyboard

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The power to blame Indonesian children for your misfortunes.

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!