the ablity to have giant erections but only at story time

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The power to increase the amount of earwax by 300 percent at will.

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The power to mentally control tapeworms.

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the power of spontaneous combustion but only when you get an erection

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the power to poop forever and pee forever. ,the power too teleport 1in.

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the ability to throw a midget further than any mortal man

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The power to make thing look blurry for your self

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The power to slightly disfigure anything made out of macaroni.

thumb_up thumb_down +63

The power to have super-sonic hearing but only for one second every three hours.

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The power to sing like Justin Beiber.

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The power to go your nose hair by 3 inches every 3 hours

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The power to drown on land.

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The power to smell bacon and/or ham at 3 o clock in the afternoon on the second Saturday of March

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The power to write a country song

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The ability to forget how to breathe automatically.

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The power to type good morals under your comments. Moral: Ever seen me post an actual moral (even less a GOOD one?) Pssh! There is no such thing as good, not that I am aware of at least >:)

thumb_up thumb_down +119

The power to teleport to the middle of the Pacific Ocean

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The power to dream about being asleep.

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The power to see everything BUT u have to be blind Or the powaaaaaa.... srry anyway the power to hear every damn thing but u have to def Congrats : u lost one of your senses for nothing at all have fun but I'm not talking to the blind 1 cause u know he can't see Wat I posted@_@

thumb_up thumb_down +81

The power to bingewatch an entire season of a TV show in only five minutes, only to not remember any of it and have to watch it all again through normal means.

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The power to laugh while laughing.

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The power to teleport to any 3rd world country

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The power to perfectly tie a Cherry stem in your mouth only while your in and elevator going down in Shanghai on the fourth shortest tower with a pink roof

thumb_up thumb_down +68

The power to become white by going into midtown harlem at night and shouting: I HATE NEGROES!!! At the top of your lungs.

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!