The power to pick something up and stay the same.

the power to shrink to 1 inch but only in a crowded street and you cant look up girls dresses,

The power to use the english language to grammatical perfection. er, ferpection.

The Ability to make everybody hate YOU!

The ability to run... AT THE SPEED OF MAN

THE SUPER FRIENDS HEROES LEAGUE OF SUPER HEROES OF LESSER USEFUL HEROES! KNIGHT FARTSALOT!: Fear my methane! You and me in one small room for 3 days and you will faint for sure! Uncle Diabeetush: Save their parents Captain! Ill take care of their children! Captain Novolin: I have great sugar level control! Help me! Evil Mistress Sugarpie is too sweet! Runald MagnifiCient Donalds: HAMBARGAR HAMBARGAR HAMBARGAR WOOOOO! I keep American people from starvation! Remember kids less than 250 pounds counts as starvation! And their LEADER... MORAL MAN!: The hell am I introducing myself here for? Damn you Subconscious! How can you expect people to understand my genius of putting myself here! They are morons! Oh... hi everybody.. wazzup?

the ability to be 7 feet tall but drive a smart car

The power to turn Hydrogen Peroxide into water but only while you're using it to clean out your ears

The power to recite all of Encyclopedia Brown's cases in alphabetical order.

The power to make it inconveniently drizzle when crime is happening

the power to be in AA.

power to turn ur self invisible with clothes exept for ur dick and pubic hair

the ability to hear yourself think

the power to forget what you were do-- wait, what?

The power to fly whenever you sneeze.

The power to stand up and do what's right, save people, restore order, preserve life, maintain balance and create peace but the lack of motivation to do so.

the ability to drink coffee without burning your tongue.

The ability to wink with both eyes, at the same time

The power to sleep on road trips but only if you're not in a car.

The power to slap the thigh and ride the wave :P

The power to grow the pinky nail of your right hand

the power to destroy the planet you are standing on

the ability to fail lie detector tests.... consistently.

The power to transform into Forever Alone guy and not be able to transform back.

Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!