The ability to telepathically talk to people, but its sent in Morse code in dog whistle so human's can't hear it

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The power to think about pointless superpowers at any time.

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The power to sneeze in front of birthday cakes

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The power to read the entire Twilight series withou suffering brain damage, only once you have to read all four books in the same sitting.

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the ability to increase your debts in the bank.

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The ability to unbleep swear words on your tv.

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The power to make your penis able to go through any nown material in the universe even a dwarf star. However it is 1000x more sensitive to pain than normal. And once you start you can't stop until it's trough.

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Diamond hard left nipple!

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The power to make my mom shout at me

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the power to forget what you were do-- wait, what?

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The power to assasinate people with touch from your finger, while you are asleep.

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The power to grow two extra arms that are invisible, can't touch anything, and you can't control.

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The power to breath fire even though you are not fireproof.

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The ability to smell like a rotting corpse

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whatever the hell the hulk does. aside from the whole angryface thing

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to be able to walk on water for 2minutes at a time

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The power to perform the Kali Ma sacrificial ritual on yourself.

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the power to come down off a high but only if you have cancer

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the ability to be in a video game sold in Africa

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the ability to turn off any fans on a hot day

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The power to deliver gifts around the world in one night but be fatter than hell, live in a frozen wasteland, and only little kids think you exist

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The power to take offence to anything said or done like it matters...

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The power to shoot lasers out your eyes but the first time you do it it burns your eyes and you go blind

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the power to open a locked door with a key

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!