The ability to Hi

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The power fuse yourself with a two lifeless jellyfish use their vital systems

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The power to time travel to the present moment

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The ability to laugh like tickle me elmo

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Ultra-strength when peeing

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the ability to stay in the same place while running

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The ability not cry while cutting onions, only after hearing the news that a family member has just died

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The power to steal all the money in the world without ever stealing anything ever.

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The ability to charge my iPhone, by starring at it real hard while rubbing my nipples!!!

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The power to get a boner any time you want

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the ability to "speak in tongues"...

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The power to levitate only down stairs

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to be able to walk on water for 2minutes at a time

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The power to make pot legal except when there's cops around.

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the power to be tall only if your Yao Ming

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The ability to fire a gun with precision accuracy. But only if your the target

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The power to teleport someone into the nearest restroom after they've touched your thighs.

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The ability to make broken pens work again.

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The ability to shapeshift into any items but only pedophiles can use it

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the power to dive 50km/h but only when nobodys watching

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The awe-inspiring power of being able to throw up at will while yelling IMMA FIRIN' ME LAZOR.

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Thhe ability to cry acid

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the power to shrink to 1 inch but only in a crowded street and you cant look up girls dresses,

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The power to return my ps4 for the third time, and wait for months to get a new one only to discover its the tv connection which is broken and I cant afford a new tv because I already spent a lot of money on ps4 games. Mural: FUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUU!

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!