The power of knowing every fact about dolphins

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The power to be better than Chuck Norris, but you have to be in a lucid sleep.

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The power to talk in Wingdings.

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The ability to have telekinesis on February the 30th

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The power to skid against the ground at 45 mph

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whenever you want to sleep an anime starts happening in real life

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The power to summon a spray of bullets going everywhere in the room, and bullet-vulnerability.

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The power to instantly make an accurate assessment on tomorrow's hangover probability well before you've consumed far more than the amount of alcohol which would guarantee it...and yet manage to forget sometimes you have this superpower.

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The power to write pointless superpowers

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To fly.. into the zone.."Friend zone"

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The power to speak any language except the language of your people.

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The power to breath Oxygen

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The power to change locations with: Michael Jackson, Elvis, Hitler, Stalin, and many more, simply by jumping up and down 3 times, and just in case of trouble, you can change back by doing the same this time. (good luck jumping inside a sealed casket smartass.

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The power of being pointless

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The power to play Call of Duty for free, if you've already bought the game not for free.

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The power to click the left button of your mause, only by thinking of how you click it,while your finger is on the button.

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The power to become attractive to women. but only when your with elderly people and Sarah Palin.

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The power to fly, but only fly north

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The power to know when a painting is crooked but it only works if the painting is noticeably crooked.

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The Power of your footstep sounding like a horse gallop

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Infinite knowledge when dead

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The ability to become visible at will.

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The power that when you sit down you fall through the seat

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Most of Gods powers part 2: Let us pretend that God really created everything... including sin right? God: Jebus, I want you to go down to earth and receive torture of legendary proportions, and die. Jebus: Why? God: To remove sin... Jebus: Uh... cant you just remove it? God replies either: 1. Yeah but ill be more fun this way, ill have you killed just to show you are not mortal anyways lol troll! 2. No, Sin is more powerful than me, so you better go die to not really die, relax... 3. Son, my ways are mysterious, "thunderstorm scares Jebus to go down) Moral disclaimer: God can be anyone`s God, and Jebus is not to be confused with the completely different Jesus. I mean every God out there and Jebus is simply a name I put instead of whoever prophet your religion has, so I really insulted everyone religious. Moral: (the other was a disclaimer) Religion is written by men... drunk men... now go eat your bread and drink your wine... and you shall become like Jebus... tortured and crucified? To show the world you are immortal? Side effects: Alcholism and all that follows, including a quicker death... to prove your immortality? (Hypnosis is powerful shit, especially when you are drunk, take it from a experienced hypnotist)

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!