The power to teleport yourself anywhere you want except for your major organs.

The power to read a book in 2 seconds but forget everything but the title.

The ability to recall lyrics of particularly terrible music with perfect accuracy.

The ability to look directly at the sun without damaging your eyes.

the power to be in AA.

The power to have some fucking muslim (white guy, no arab) tell my wife that since we have been married for three years and I Speak spanish/Russian/Japanse/Itali... Anyways that she should at least be able to speak fluently spanish so shame on her. (The fuck I be teaching her spanish in Norway?) The power? To tell my wife that if I ever see him, I will chop his head off... My wife said I think he meant it well, I said, so do I. The reason its useless? My wife refused so I had to enter their stupid meeting room and tell him myself... He asked me who I was while shivering, my answer: Want to learn how to speak motherdfucking spanish? He supposedly spent staring down the floor for hours while refusing his boss`s offer to call the cops on me and told my wife to tell me he was sorry. I goddamn bet he is fucking sorry! Nero: Now and forever.

The power to shift baroque and rococo era paintings proximately 2" up and 3" to the left.

make youself dumb

The power to drive a car, but only once you've passed your driver's license.

power to transform into a dick with legs

The power to never be old but died at young age

The ability to go blind every time you open your eyes

The ability to build a wall... wait a minute!

The ability to eat fruit cake without gagging.

The ability to swim in water.

The super power to do something pointless when you can be doing something pointless

the power to make sounds by vibrating your vocal cords.

The power to make everyone think that having no power is the ultimate power so everyone thinks they're powerful when they realize they have no powers but you have one so you win

The power to get an erection in the most akward of situations.

The to ejaculate anytime but only when your mom appears in front of you.

the power to make hate films against Islam... theres no space for bigots and jerks on this Earth.

The power to control time by pressing your right elbow under your right armpit

the power to dislike this power

The power of christ ;)

Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!