The power to shit out toilet paper.

thumb_up thumb_down +78

The power to change locations with: Michael Jackson, Elvis, Hitler, Stalin, and many more, simply by jumping up and down 3 times, and just in case of trouble, you can change back by doing the same this time. (good luck jumping inside a sealed casket smartass.

thumb_up thumb_down +78

the power to make food shrimp.

thumb_up thumb_down +78

The power of temporary invincibility but you have to kill yourself first

thumb_up thumb_down +78

Liam Brudenell

thumb_up thumb_down +76

The power to understand irony.

thumb_up thumb_down +74

the power to to deep fry anything deep fried

thumb_up thumb_down +74

The power to have everything taste like rubbing alcohol

thumb_up thumb_down +74

The power to say things twice. The power to say things twice.

thumb_up thumb_down +74

The power to swim on land.

thumb_up thumb_down +72

The power to implode when you have pee and you can't stop

thumb_up thumb_down +72

the power to any ugly person love you.

thumb_up thumb_down +72

Listen to Justin Bieber and Rebecca Black everywhere you go.

thumb_up thumb_down +72

the power of the home depot lisp... and as an added bonus the power of how the universe works lisp

thumb_up thumb_down +70

The power to shut me the F UCK UP! Moral: Ironically I have not said a single word for hours... so that would be impossible... Now, if you hear MY voice when you read this, then you are either psychic or psychotic, which is not that different if you ask me... Now.. if you hear YOUR voice inside your head, then YOU SHUT THE FRUCK UP AND GET LOST! :D :D :D :D :D :D (A MoralMan Original, now this one was pretty cool)

thumb_up thumb_down +70

The power to blow up, before a bomb next to you blows up.

thumb_up thumb_down +70

The power to be Omnipotent and create a rock too heavy for yourself to lift.

thumb_up thumb_down +70

The power to have your toe nails and fingernails be bulletproof.

thumb_up thumb_down +64

The power to make remotes invisible

thumb_up thumb_down +64

The power to poop almost instantly, but you always have the runs.

thumb_up thumb_down +64

The power to pick your nose but you happen to be Lord Voldermot

thumb_up thumb_down +64

The ability to read. No wait that is actually helpful. Never mind.

thumb_up thumb_down +62

The power to fart to inside. By mouth.

thumb_up thumb_down +62

The power to die whenever you feel the slightest bit joyful, happy excited, etc.

thumb_up thumb_down +62

Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!