The power to give the wrong directions

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The power to speak in languages that no one around you understands.

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The ability to create your own reflection on any reflective surface.

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The power to fly while masturbating.

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The power to start time only when it's on.

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The power to die when you change emotions

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The power to have all sensory input interpreted as pain

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The power to die after life has left you old and decrepit.

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The power to vote for the Presidential candidate of your choice, only to be overruled by the Florida Supreme Court.

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The power of having the answer to every possible question, but also to have no way of describing said answers!

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The power to make a woman make you a sandwich

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the ability to discern homophobic, racist, and mysoginistic posts on this site from the actually ok ones.. oh wait this is useful STOP BEING A JACKASS

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power to send mind messages to people but nobody listens to you

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The power to shit bombs that only go off when bitten by you.

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The ability to find a use for High School Algebra.

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The power to touch the ground using only your feet

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To tell how many kids in a sweatshop it took to make your nike's

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The power to be a normal human

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the power to be invisible, but only at night

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?u?op ?p?sdn ?d?? o? ???od ???

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The ability to consume nutrient of the object what you swallow.

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The power to wake up and live through school....

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Can fall without taking any injury, but for only 1 foot.

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make youself dumb

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!