the ability to be governor and have an Argentinian mistress

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The power to be buried at sea

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The power to type: Hey if you wanna read funny "superpewers", then you have come to the right place! Just follow the trail of The moral man so he can stay in the middle the place where nobody looks or gives a sh... you know what? Dont thumb me, Moral man wants to stay down here rather than stuck in the middle of nowhere. Moral: If telling people to read more pointless superpowers at the "newest" superpowers, isnt pointless, then that would mean that this whole "pointless superpowers section is really meaningful... which by itself is meaningless... WIN!

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Swiss army teeth.

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having the ability to not piss yourself when your on the toilet.

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The ability to go 100% slower

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The power to still have 0.01 percent of germs on your hands.

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The power to smell your own feet without taking your shoes out.

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The power to have a black president

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The power to push any muffin button, but u get no muffins

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The ablity to slap a policeman and get away with it.

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The power to remember a song's name, but you forget when you want to search, write down, or talk about it.

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The ability to speak all languages ever recorded in history, but cannot speak without using at least 10 of them simultaneously.

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Turning into a brick wall. Forever.

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The ability to kick in a three point shot but only during a game.

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The power to not have powers that arent pointless but then you realize your a normal human bein then you just think hey mabey I can be like Batman but then also you were like hey why am I not a multi-billionaire . After this all you find out you have the power to wake up at 12 pm only while using a alarm clock set for 7 am

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The power to make one's skin very bumpy.

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The power to be Helen Keller at will.

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The power to kill yourself with your mind.

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Being able to shapeshift into a grandpa then not being able to turn back until next year

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The power to never be burned, but only when underwater.

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The ability to read minds by absorbing their mental disorders

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The power to walk forward and walk backwards at the same time in a lying down position while your asleep having a wet dream about goat puppies.

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mint berry crunch

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!