the ability to see into the past

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The power to sweat blood uncontrollably out of your anus while singing to Justin Beiber and stabbing yourself in the dick with a machete

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The power to not get caught typing this in lesson.

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The power to be able to have intercourse with every girl you want, while being the most gay man alive..

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The power to not be able to reach the top shelf.

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The power to go part way through walls

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The power to resurrect, but only in an electric chair in Texas.

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The power to feel lustful when watching My Little Pony Clopfic.

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The power to understand the purpose of live, and every other world mystery, exactly .5 of a second before you die.

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The power to make yourself get a cramp at will.

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The power to be the most attractive person ever but only in complete darkness.

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the power to send future you crazy

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the power of the succulent game

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Just because you do not see and advert here, it does not mean it is not here... Moral: Dudu duduh dudududun... ALWAYS MORAL-COLA! (aka Moke in the brits) NOW IN LIGHT AND SUPERFAT EDITIONS! Order now for the special I am fagneto edition! TASTE THE FAGNETIC! Because if gay is your way, todays morals, support this way! Lesbian-Coke is out of stock, but pre-order now and receive a moral man offer: "the lesbian drunk party invite international live!" *porn music* Hurry up! Only 2 Billion tickets left! No wait... just 50 left!... no wait... 40... no 30... 29... you better hurry ladies! As much *free* booze you can drink! *The booze Is free, the entrance is free, but the payment to get out of the building depends on how much you drink, non payers will be graped and their sex pictures will be sold on the internet* *All lesbian sex pictures will be sold on the internet, grape is not allowed! Surprise sexy time is allowed though!* Moral-Cola!

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Ability to suck **** like austin calhoun

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the ability to fly underwater.

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The power to part clouds when there are no clouds.

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The power to know the answer to every question you're asked, but forgetting it instantly.

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The power to be a normal person

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the power to orgasm more than once in one round of sex. the thing is, after the 4th time, it gets slightly uncomfortable.

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the power to turn invisible in corners but only in igloos

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The power to be as strong as a bear... but only when fighting another bear.

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To sumon a cheeto named bill every time you say cow.

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THE POWER TO SHOW HOW SERIOUS YOU ARE VIA CAPITALIZATION

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!