The power to make the tip of your penis invisible at will.

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the power to sugar a limpet

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The power of intermittent hand seizures, at the most unfortunate of times.

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The power to speak in cursive

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The power to thumb down Moral Man's posts. NOTE: It is required that the user of this ability possess average to above-average intellect. Seriously, bury this dickbag's posts. He's an annoying twat.

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The power to have the biggest boner ever in the middle of a presentation.

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the power to read 9999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999 books every second

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The power to not yawn after someone else does.

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When walking down the street, i try to get to a crack in the pavement a few feet ahead of me, and step on it before the next car passes me on the road

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The power to read thoughts but it reads everyones thoughts at the same time and you can't decipher whose thought is whose

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The power to taste the 2% that's real juice

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The power to look ugly but only in front of you crush

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the power to make your best friend's crush fall in love with you, but not your own crush.

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the power to... SHUT THE F*CK UP

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The power to keep hair from growing on your head forever.

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Ability to make your eyes switch sockets

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The ability to pee as a gas, not a liquid

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the power to pee shit and shit piss.

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The power to make your family act like total rednecks but only in front of your girl/boyfriend.

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The power to fly only when in a car.

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The power to have any power you want but only when it's completely useless to have it.

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The power to make someone see your smile slightly whiter

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The power to breathe without thinking about it.

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The power to fall off a tree, then land in spikes.

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!