The power to talk to animals but only if they've been run over first.

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The ability to fly as long as you're touching the floor.

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The power to eat just one lays potato chip

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The ability to see women naked, but only if they weigh 400 pounds or more.

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The ability to produce infinite cat flavored toast made from poop out of your mouth, only while in public with 100 people that would stare at you.

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The power to make water expire.

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Listen to Justin Bieber and Rebecca Black everywhere you go.

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A solar-powered flashlight.

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the power to perminately bring jade goody back from the dead

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The power to expel a slight breeze after inhaling.

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The power to charge your iPhone if it is not an iPhone

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The ability to be a jew during the holocaust

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The power to defeat Chuck Norris but only if you can reach the speed of light

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the power to speak in Braille.

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The power to realize when you are wasting your life typing useless shit on the internet

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The power to spontaneously combust while nobody is around!

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the power to orgasm more than once in one round of sex. the thing is, after the 4th time, it gets slightly uncomfortable.

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The power to be Chuck Norris's bitch.

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To be able to run the speed of light but only works if your standing still?.

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The power to see through womens clothes but every woman you use it on instantly gets saggy breasts.

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the power to talk to animals.......without them understanding you.

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The power to instantly not be doing anything as long as you aren't doing anything beforehand.

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The power to put your pants on, two legs at a time.

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The power to have sex with anyone you like except human beings. -Shandric

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!