The ability to inhale carbon dioxide and exhale oxygen.

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the power to reach a top speed of 200 miles an our, but only in built-up areas

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The power to talk in Wingdings.

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the power to find a needle in a haystack

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the power to turn into a dead person

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Most of Gods powers part 2: Let us pretend that God really created everything... including sin right? God: Jebus, I want you to go down to earth and receive torture of legendary proportions, and die. Jebus: Why? God: To remove sin... Jebus: Uh... cant you just remove it? God replies either: 1. Yeah but ill be more fun this way, ill have you killed just to show you are not mortal anyways lol troll! 2. No, Sin is more powerful than me, so you better go die to not really die, relax... 3. Son, my ways are mysterious, "thunderstorm scares Jebus to go down) Moral disclaimer: God can be anyone`s God, and Jebus is not to be confused with the completely different Jesus. I mean every God out there and Jebus is simply a name I put instead of whoever prophet your religion has, so I really insulted everyone religious. Moral: (the other was a disclaimer) Religion is written by men... drunk men... now go eat your bread and drink your wine... and you shall become like Jebus... tortured and crucified? To show the world you are immortal? Side effects: Alcholism and all that follows, including a quicker death... to prove your immortality? (Hypnosis is powerful shit, especially when you are drunk, take it from a experienced hypnotist)

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The ability to jump

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The power to recite all of Encyclopedia Brown's cases in alphabetical order.

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The power to know what someone thought, after they told you.

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The power to make lipstick fly

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The power to think up the best lines but forget them when you try to speak

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The power to worsen your own eyesight at will.

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To be able to think like a noob gamer and if they are not thinking about games you faint

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The power to speak brail.

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the power to tell when someone is in your car

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The ability to be smarter than the average bear.

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The power to breath in lava, If you don't burn.

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The power to be able to be a guy who can create and control fire but if it touches you, you still burn

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The power to push "pull" doors

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The power to jump -50% higher

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The power to turn into random objects

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The power to turn cake into pie

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The power to enhance your enemy's strength

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The power to sit on a couch whenever your mother tells you that you can.

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!