The ability to turn into a melting crayon for $20

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Most of God`s powers. One: He has existed eternally, and one day he said: LET THERE BE LIGHT! Uh... so he has lived eternal eternities in the dark? Explains his shitty mood... Two: Speaking about let there be light... the very first sentence he utters is wrong, because "First God created light".... And then he went "oops" and time traveled back in time to create voice first so he could say anything? Three: He sent his son to combat sin... how powerful is sin? So powerful that a so called omnipotent being had to sacrifice his son? And what sacrifice is it to have your immortal son killed just to prove that he is immortal? Sounds like a guy being sawed in half and then coming out whole... TADAH! (applause from the audience). So in the end he sacrificed... nothing? He died to prove he could not die? Moral: Jesus: Epic troll..

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The power to glow in the dark, but only during the day..

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the power to fly, but only when you are in a plane that is already flying. inflight flight

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The power to hear in the dark.

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the power to stand straight but only when you bend over

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The power to press the "I have read and agree with the terms on service -" button without actually reading them.

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The power to write my own pointless superpower ?

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The ability to poop glue.

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The power to stand in line at the DMV with a smile on your face.

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The power to fly but only when your on the ground

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The power to be able to shoot arrows really well...cough.

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the power to reach a top speed of 200 miles an our, but only in built-up areas

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the power to break the nib of a pencil so that its pointless

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The power of a power of a power of a power

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the power to read your own mind

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The power to read this text unless you can see it.

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The power to reverse age all the way into your fathers balls. Nero: Know my name and fear it.

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the power to breathe in space but have to be were there is gravity

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The power to throw fireballs only under water

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The power to reproduce asexually.

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The power to feel the emotions of the dead ones

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The power of magnetism! Aka being so magnetic that you have to live in a home completely made out of plastic, and cant go out because you either get hit by random flying frying pans and stuff literally attracted towards you, or even worse, you could get dragged towards a car in movement and become red paste. A guy with this power could not take it any more, so he bought an iron necklace and put it on... may he rest in peace...

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The superpower to have a superpower

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!