The power to make my mom shout at me

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The ability to telepathically talk to people, but its sent in Morse code in dog whistle so human's can't hear it

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The ability to unbleep swear words on your tv.

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The power to pick something up and stay the same but smell bad.

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The power to climb up fallen trees

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The power to have night vision during the day.

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Being able to create duplicates of yourself, however you must give birth to these duplicates out of your anus (incredibly painful and its highly likely that you will pass out from the pain). And to disappear they must claw their way back up.

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The power to make the dead that where once deaf see again.

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The power to become invisible when no one is looking.

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The power to walk on your butt cheeks

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the power to be justin bieber

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The ability to headbutt yourself in the face.

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the power to jump, but only on any surface

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The power to be and do whatever you want except living forever, only when you are dead

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The power that when you sit down you fall through the seat

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The power to psychically give politicians half baked excuses for failed and immoral decisions.

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The power to instantly kill anyone you start to love

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The power of drawing perfects dog dicks, but not dogs at all.

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The power to shift baroque and rococo era paintings proximately 2" up and 3" to the left.

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The power to taste the colors of M&M's.

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The power to look at Chuck Norris. I dare you to try.

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The power to turn on your tv with your mind as long as the remote is in your hand and has batteries.

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the power to lift anything under the weight of 2 lbs

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the power to have 20/20 vision only when wearing aviators

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!