Be dumb and gay like austin Calhoun

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the power to make food shrimp.

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The power to achieve 98% opacity

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the power to turn a dollar into 99 cents

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The power to accidently find all spoilers online before you watch a film or an episode of a series.

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The power to shoot off your clothes at any moment while using your hands and feet

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The power to be vegan but not tell anyone

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The power to make your left hand glow whenever you put your right hand up your ass.

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The power to yell WOW THOSE ARE SOME GIANT MELONS LADY! And have her blush and giggle, as your girlfriend grabs you and kisses you, just to make sure to "balloon lady" that you are not on the free market. Moral: And you think I act unusual here... Hah! That is simply because you lack the ability to love... the most important person in your life, the one that will take care of your beloved ones, the one that will inspire his friends... Yourself... sadly we are in a time period where being a modest emo is in... Well, I am out! Out there, being free!

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The ability to teleport at a random point of the space.

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The power to instantly ginger-fy random strangers on the other side of the world.

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The power to lose the remote.

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The power to grow increasingly warm fur as your body temperature rises.

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the power to look like a boy and sing like a girl (bieber joke)

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the ability to die once you have died

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The power to jump and fly for 1 second.

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The ability to count to potato

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The power to grow your nails longer

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The power to climb up fallen trees

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???q? ?o?? sp??oq??? ?nq ????u o? ???l?q? ???

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The ability to kill oxygen in a radius around you

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The power to lock a public toilet door and climb over the walls with ease.

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The ability to grow trees out of money.

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The power to die when you die

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!