The Power to penetrate Ellen Degeneres's Vagina.

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The ability to grow and shrink in size, but you still have the same strength and weight and can only do it once a month

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To be able to turn into any molusk when in a lava pit

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The ability to know any language but only after learning it.

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The ability to be 16 and sing like a woman and only have 10 year old girls like you

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Power to turn off your computer randomly. You cannot controll that power.

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whatever the hell the hulk does. aside from the whole angryface thing

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Everything Hawkeye does

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The power of bad luck

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The power to kill someone as long as they've already been killed.

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The power to have a poo at your girlfriend's house and be only 22.2% sure that it will flush

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To control electronical devices, only while holding it's remote.

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The power to steal all the money in the world without ever stealing anything ever.

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The power to always know what time it is down to the millisecond in Hokkaido, Japan.

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The power to become any animal, but you have to be touching that animal to transform and it can only be a rat.

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The power to absorb alcohol twice as fast

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Swiss army teeth.

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The power to spend your money on yourself, when you gotta do something useful with it, like giving it to me. Moral: GIVE ME THY TRESUUUR!

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Read fortune cookies without opening them

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The power to speak 360 words/min. in multi-language.

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The power to kill someone at 20 meters with your mind, but it doesn't work within 21 meters.

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The ability to regrow 1 strand of hair every 2 years.

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The power to turn into a slightly smaller, weaker version of yourself.

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The power to travel back in time! But only 10 seconds. But only every 10 seconds. And you have to do the exact same thing or the universe will explode.

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!