The ability to make knifes out of your own feces.

The power to make it inconveniently drizzle when crime is happening

The power to ejaculate laser beams.

Power To Throw Power Booger In Every 5 Seconds

The ability to talk to fish while in the desert.

The power to talk to animals. Especially when you tell your friend to dress like one.

The ability to quit smoking by giving yourself lung, heart, and throat cancer, coupled with enphysema.

THE SUPER FRIENDS HEROES LEAGUE OF SUPER HEROES OF LESSER USEFUL HEROES! KNIGHT FARTSALOT!: Fear my methane! You and me in one small room for 3 days and you will faint for sure! Uncle Diabeetush: Save their parents Captain! Ill take care of their children! Captain Novolin: I have great sugar level control! Help me! Evil Mistress Sugarpie is too sweet! Runald MagnifiCient Donalds: HAMBARGAR HAMBARGAR HAMBARGAR WOOOOO! I keep American people from starvation! Remember kids less than 250 pounds counts as starvation! And their LEADER... MORAL MAN!: The hell am I introducing myself here for? Damn you Subconscious! How can you expect people to understand my genius of putting myself here! They are morons! Oh... hi everybody.. wazzup?

the power to see through hills , but only in saskatchewan

The power to be immortal, but only on 29th February.

The power to use the internet whenever you want, but only on dialup

The power to not be affected by bullets unless you are shot with one by a gun

The power to set time to High Noon whenever its 11:59:51

The power to attract flies everytime you're eating or on a date.

i love to make shit brix

The power to summon anything from any store, after paying 10 times its worth.

The power to summon a Genie lamp, that if rubbed allows you to wish for 3 pointless superpowers.

The ability to smell colors.

The power to think of a pointless superpower

The power to give onesself a heart attack just by thinking about it.

The power to keep up with the kardashians

The power to make everyone else blink around you when you blink.

the power to be a free wireless hotspot only when you are completely motionless.

the power of breath 10 times per second of you will die

Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!