the power to make my 8==D go 8=D 8===D 8=D 8===D.

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The power to touch the ground using only your feet

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The power to f*ck yourself

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The power to teleport but you must have walked to that place within the last attosecond

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The ability to have 99 problems without one of them being a female

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The power to run half as fast as whoever is chasing you.

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The power to be able to walk .00000002 times faster whenever you want

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The ability to be absurdly clever and funny only when you're alone.

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The power to kill yourself with a piece of paper.

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The power to create garbage out of nowhere.

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The power to be arrested for crimes you did not commit

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The superpower of surviving a gunshot, if properly attended in a hospital afterwards.

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The power to survive falls frrom great heights, but only if you land on your index finger.

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The power to turn everything you touch into shit.

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The power to build a building that is comparable to the sistine chapel, but without doors.

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The power to grammar.

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The power to fly but only when your feet are touching the ground.

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The power to generate fecal matter when being held at gunpoint.

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The power to have all the powers of all the superheroes, but only on February 30th.

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the power to not have power

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The power to have sex with anyone you want in the world, but only after you die.

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The ability to make the girl of your dreams fall in love with you BUT you become a retarded octopus if you use this power

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The power to be a gamer

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The power to have the longest little finger

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!