All of Superman's powers except instead of Kryptonite your weakness is water

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The ability to laugh listening to Trololo

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the power to transform into pedobear with diplomatic immunity...

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The ability to cure someone of HIV, but you contract it yourself.

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The power to know exactly when you are going to die, instantly! (died instantly)

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The power to spontaneously combust into trillions of microscopic kittens, every time you stare a cat photo for more then 3 hours.

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The ability to glow in the dark but only when your really sleepy.

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The power to write an essay and your teacher gives you a D or an E for trying to do your best, even though he/she talk about stuff we don't even care about

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The power to breath while under a container of water

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the power to become phil collins, but only after peter gabrial left

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The power to shoot spiderwebs but only out of your fully erect dick

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The ability to piss flames.

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The ability to defecate red clay bricks when startled or scared

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The power to guess a multiple choice answer correctly some of the time.

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The ability to jump 8 feet fences

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The power of being Chuck Norris and be the main utterly pointless source of pointless powers.

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The power to transform any valuable rock into celery

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The power to see through clothes of women 70+.

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The power to defeat any ant you may encounter.

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The power to slip on anything.

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The power to use a computer whenever you want, but only at libraries

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Gay mens power to making straight women like them...

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penis

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The power to kill yourself just by thinking about something.

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!