the power to fall off of a cliff and live... in hell

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The power to help bitches stay alive! Bitches love staying alive!

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The power to every two months to shoot three cotton balls at no great velocity from your left hand.

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The power to see in to the future of one second

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The ability to transform yourself in to a vibrator that is about to be used. Only works if you are gay.

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The amazing ability to shart at your own will.

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The ability to see everything in black and white.

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The ability to melt ice slower than it would usually melt

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The power to read 20 pages of pointless superpowers, but only during science class

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The involuntary power (or rather compulsion) to add "collectors edition" to everything you ever give or sell or buy. "Old bike, but in perfect condition: Collectors edition" "Hi I am selling my body "Collectors edition" "Sadly I am allergic to my German shepherd: "Collectors edition" so I have to give it away." "Hi excuse me, where do I find the "collectors edition" Milk in this store? Eh? No any kind of "collectors edition Milk is fine" Sigh... What I mean is...

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The power to burst into flames but not be immune to heat.

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The power to live,but only when you are dead

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The power to make your family act like total rednecks but only in front of your girl/boyfriend.

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the power to only get an erection when a family member is looking

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the power to make stupid useless puns and not pay attention to the villian

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The ability to stare without blinking for an infinite amount of time, but only whilst watching two girls one cup.

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The power to differentiate between captal 'i's and lower case 'l's.

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The power to be hungry without eating a Snickers bar.

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the ability to commit a crime and be arrested for twice as long as you should have been in the first place

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The power to talk to animals and plants, but only to have really boring conversations with them.

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The power to annoy people

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the power to fly for 2-6 seconds only when every apple product in arizona is at 100% battery level

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The power to enhance your enemy's strength

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The power to teleport homeless people to the sun

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!