The power to buy jerky on a semi-weekly basis.

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the power to be famous but no one in the world knows you are

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The power to be white and have a the pingas a size of a black man. Moral: You cannot comprehend the power of the dark side.

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The power to fly as long as your feet the ground

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The power to throw chess pieces mildly accuratly,

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The power of exploding when you think.

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the power to make plants grow at a slightly excelled rate when lying on top of them .... you also smell like shit, all the time.

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the power to dance in the dark

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The power to speak to toasters

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the power to suck at absolutly everything you do, except at failing.

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the power to remotely jizz in someone's sock.

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The power to phase through toilet paper.

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The power to lick your own elbow...

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The ability to breath fire through your mouth but only when your mouth is closed.

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The power to ignore useful information

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The power to urinate in any color- even rainbow color!

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The power to get the ketchup bottle open.

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The ability to become the most attractive person in the world, but only when you're all alone. Also, it doesn't show up on film.

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the power to teleport anywhere and see anything but every time to teleport there's 75% chance you'll die

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The power to teleport 10 years into the past just by sneezing. You also become hyper allergic to everything. And of course, you have no way to travel forward...

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the ability to pee in your own butt.

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The ability to scull down endless amounts of softdrink without vomiting

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The power to eat toxic waste as long as it is not toxic but die from non-toxic waste and stuff

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the power to talk to animals but only when it means stealing your ice cream

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!