the power to make food shrimp.

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The power to give yourself cancer

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The ability to change clothes instantly every 67 years

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The ability to have pockets in your skin that can only fit carrots.

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the power to read captchas

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whenever you want to sleep an anime starts happening in real life

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the power to win any video game with your feet but only when intoxicated

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???q? ?o?? sp??oq??? ?nq ????u o? ???l?q? ???

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The power to always be the third in the slowest supermarket lines.

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The power to shape shift, but only into yourself two inches taller.

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the power to steal 4 avocados in july at a supermarket at 9:37 am in your underpants without arms while a cop laughs at how stupid you look. plus while you do that a cute marshmallow comes and rapes your children.

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The power to transform into Forever Alone guy and not be able to transform back.

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The power of laser pointer vision.

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the power to turn into toilet paper but not back

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The power to fly for as long the average human is in the air during a vertical jump.

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The power to cum every time you show your private parts.

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The ability to talk to bacteria

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The power to stop people from walking through closed doors.

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The power to become paralyzed whenever you're aroused.

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The power to time travel to the end of the world.

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The power to shoot lemons out of your urethra.

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Good News Everyone! You have the power to read this is my voice!

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The power to be 0.00000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000001 seconds younger

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the power to time travel to the present

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!