The power to fly, but only when standing on ground...

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The ability to heal someone by trying to beat them to a pulp.

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The power to go back in time but never go forward

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The power to see when your eyes are not closed.

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The ablity to slap a policeman and get away with it.

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The power to speak any language except the language of your people.

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The power to run the fastest when everyone in the world is standing still

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The power to remember your past failures and all the pain you ever received every time you close your eyes. And you have no appossable thumbs.

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A follow up to the next comment bellow... (the irony) is that you also get the powers to type YOU CANT HANDLE THE TRUTH! And other quotes at random points... I got these powers... you do not believe me? YOU THINK YOU HAVE THAT LUXURY? YOU CANT HANDLE THE TRUTH! Moral: GUANTANAMO BAY CUBA! Just making conversation... (throws random small dog in the trash container) last part was just me its not like you get the power to do what he does in movies :P

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The ability to teleport to the Taj Mahal whenever you want ONLY the Taj Mahal

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The power to unsee the unseen.

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the power to fly for 2-6 seconds only when every apple product in arizona is at 100% battery level

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the power to speak fluent clingon, but only to the non-metally disabled

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the power to only eat sugar, but not things that tastes sweet.

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The power to read the entire Twilight series withou suffering brain damage, only once you have to read all four books in the same sitting.

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The ability to not make a face when eating a lemon, but only after you have already eaten 5 lemons.

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The power of gentle breeze

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The power to get the most rated pointless superpowers post

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The power to be on facebook and do homework at the same time

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The ability to swim on dry land only when submerged in dry water.

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the power to have sex with any women you want. with your whole family watching

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To be able to commit a sexual offense but never get away with it

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The power to read 1.2x faster than the average person.

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To see what you are currently doing from the same perspective of your regular vision, with the ability to understand that you're doing it. But not have the ability to stop yourself from doing what you were going to do as if you didn't have the power.

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!