The power to be able to taste shit from miles away.

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The power to get instantly pruned when in contact with any liquid

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The power to read the future in a language you will never learn to understand. Moral: I read that "thy comment expects a billion red thumbs"... WTF does that mean?

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The power to get hard at will.

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The power to look into cheese.

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The power of sensing someone's sneeze before it happens

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The power to continuously shoot extremely powerful lasers from your eyes unless they're closed or you wear special, unbelievably expensive glasses.

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the power to make coffee room temperature by touching it

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the ability to go the speed limit

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the power to create the most pointless superpower

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The power to be god, but not exist.

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Autokinesis (the ability to move your own body).

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The power to stop a sneeze before it happens.

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The power to win a gold medal in the special Olympics... you are perfectly healthy

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the power to make men funnier smarter and more athletic then womer.

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the ability to shoot a little steam cloud from your penis every time you finish peeing

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The power to have psi superpowers... but YOU NEED TO CONSTRUCT ADDITIONAL PYLONS!

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The power to breath underwater only when on land.

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The power to uncontrollably say a pun every sentence during funerals

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the power to break down public transport on hot days

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The ability to walk over ball pits.

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the power to wake up each mourning with a fast food joint mascot next to you saying "You were great last night"

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done something sexual with some type of food?

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The power to look incredibly beautiful when there's no light

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!