The power to read the bible, and then learn hypnosis, and look at the bible again... Moral: And they say hypnosis is worthless because it is just suggestions... the bible uses EVERY single trick in the book, and the bible`s teaching lead to the "holy" crusades (of kill murder and rape across the world, too many died to count), the bigotry, greater intolerance to different people, and just now (Bush before him) Obama is assuring his people that this war is "GODS WILL!" And seriously, if darkness is considered evil... then no wonder Captain America and his men did not hesitate to kill and enslave Captain Africa and his people a couple years ago... And its still going on, thanks lord (sarcasm, duh) Suggestion: Most powerful force in the universe, and it is invisible to boot... daaaang im powerful.

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The power to lick your elbow.

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The ability to speak to deaf caterpillers

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the power to read this sentence

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power to breath fire but only through your nose

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The power to speak in cursive

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The power to triple-click in the time it takes a regular human to double-click.

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the power to be powerless.

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The power of superspeed...which comes with horrible stamina and Asthma.

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The power to turn into wood by rubbing salt on yourself

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Dust-mite communication. Attack my army of microscopic and fairly harmless beasts!

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The power to fit through your cat door but only when the door is unlocked.

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the immunity to bullets only after being shot 47 times and are dead

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The power to have any power you want, but only if you are touching a nine pound diamond, standing in a pool of gold, and stabbing yourself in your pineal gland, the smallest muscle in your body.

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The power to eat with your eyebrows.

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The power to cry if you hear or see the word cry

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the power to... SHUT THE F*CK UP

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The ability to run quickly, but you cannot walk.

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the power to feel the emotions of other people, that are severely depressed.

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I have the power to make /b sarcastic, witty and funny.

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The ability to spawn any object at will,but only when your saying that you have too much of that object and actually believe yourself when you say it.

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The power to make meringues levitate

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the power to eat as many brownies as you like without getting sick, but to be allergic to chocolate.

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the power to travel to parallel universes where the power to travel to parallel universes doesnt exist

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!