The power to teleport someone into the nearest restroom after they've touched your thighs.

The power to lower your IQ at will.

The ability to make iguanas in Peru blink uncontrolably

the power to be able to get pointless superpowers

The power to look like your jacking off every time your mom walks in the room

The power to become as drunk as you want without drinking anything, but having to sober up naturally

The power to run at the slowest speed possible.

The power to look really cool when sitting in a chair when nobody's looking at you

The power to not be killed by anything that can't kill you.

The ability to police irony

The Power To Explode Only When You Are In Underwater And Not In The Earth's Atmosphere And In A Room Made Of Diamond

the power to die....

The power to be 0.00000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000001 seconds younger

The ability to pass gas and have it smell like coffee from Starbucks.

The ability to part...hair.

The ability to know all the cheats/hacks for Half-Life 3.

The power to cook 3 minute noodles in under 1 minute.

The power to unsee the unseen.

The ability to li-li-li-lick you from your head to ur toes

I have the power to make /b sarcastic, witty and funny.

To survive listening to James Blunt

The power to throw up and have it go back into your mouth

The power to levitate, but only after exactly 10 hours of sleep and you have to be wearing a tin foil bathing suit.

the power to become invisible when no one sees you including security cameras

Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!