The ability to taste only from your butt-hole.

The power of turning into a crushed can right after you got into a car accident.

The power to plank

The Power Of being Overly Generous in Bad Situations.

The Power To Only Be Able To Move Yourself (including wheelchairs and all that) 1 meter in the entire life of the universe

Solar Powered Vampire Abilities

The power to vomit a thoroughly blended mix of pickles, cheese, onions, caramel, lead paint, octopi, boiling water, vinyl, super glue, hot sulfur froth, and hand sanitizer.

The power to summon cops to arrest you

Any telePATHETIC power you may get.

The power of heating things if they are located in microwave.

The power to Rage Against The Machine

The power to time travel 1 second at a time

The power to see in darkness when you're asleep.

The Power to have a bowel movement.

The ability to predict what will appear on ReCaptcha, SOLVEmedia, and all that stuff, before you see it.

The Power Above This Power During Night time. The Power Below This Power During the day. Invulnerable for one second during dawn and dusk.

The power to find this website and submit a pointless superpower.

The power to move at the speed of ripeness. Moral: Ripeness is actually slightly slower than time, true fact.

The power to speak in only anime openings

The power to constantly stumble upon the twilight zone. Moral: *creepy theme*

Crap out everything you're allergic too

The power to create shit

Using your brain when you could simply type in "google.com." in the url.

Reverse Pooping

Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!