The ability to beat your grandmother in a race

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A parapalegic with super strength! Oh and with lockjaw, and addicted to Botox.

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The power to vomit whenever you want to.

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the power to ejaculate lava.

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The power to know what card is on top of a deck, but only when it's an 8 of diamonds.

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Invisibility, but only in the dark.

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Being Yianni.

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the ability to turn off any fans on a hot day

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the ability to fly 6 inches off the groung

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The power to gain 400 pounds in 400 seconds.

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The power to chew harder than your teeth can structurally withstand.

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to be only be able to walk for 0.0183874662 ever 11.204882884832 days

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The power to know where Waldo is

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The power to come up with pointless superpowers on a website about pointless superpowers.

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The power to see what you were doing 5 seconds ago.

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the ability to laugh when jay leno tells a joke.

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The power to break a bone every time you ejaculate.

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The power to sleep with your eyes open, but when awake, to have ur eyes closed.

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The power to recognize a Jackson Pollock painting from blobs of paint.

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The ability to turn invisible, but only when everyone in the room has their eyes closed.

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The superpower wasting your time wachting a video that is pointless

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the power to make ads 0.000001 seconds shorter

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the ability to turn purple

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The power to cancel your own powers.

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!