the power to teleport 2 in. from were you were standing in 8 hours

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The power to read the minds of hobos. ( now you know what hobos think about you )

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The power to ejaculate only when you're greeting someone

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The power to have sex with an alien but not know where to put it

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The power to make dad jokes.

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Der pawr tu speek kat langwage

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the power to die at will

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The power to become a destructive green beast that demolishes cities, which you have absolutely no control over whenever you get angry or scared.

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The power to eat three times a day.

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The power to breath fire but only when covered in gasoline/petrolium

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The power to shrink your private parts.

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the power to break the nib of a pencil so that its pointless

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The power to go suicide

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The power to glow while under the sun

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The power to.... OMG a fish :D wait... what was i talking about?

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the power to look like a boy and sing like a girl (bieber joke)

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Permanent superspeed - The ability to move faster than a speeding bullet, but you can't stop moving at that speed.

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The power to fart get a 10 inch but only at your moms house

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the power to tickle people just by looking at them.

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The power to talk to slugs but not have them understand what your saying.

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the power to attract flying frisbees to your own nose

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The power to seduce any woman... that weighs over 300 pounds.

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The power to throw-up purple cheese curds on command, but you are also allergic to purple cheese curds?

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The power to predict what time it will be in 1 minute.

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!