The power to read minds, but only your own.

thumb_up thumb_down -184

The power to have superhuman strength. But I have to jack off to do so.

thumb_up thumb_down -131

the power to emit air through your mouth and nose.....

thumb_up thumb_down +92

The power to cum every time you show your private parts.

thumb_up thumb_down +144

The power to become like chuck norris. Unfortunately before you get that power you to through the true CHUCK NORRIS!!

thumb_up thumb_down +77

the power to return after death but only when youre death because you've bin ran over by a fingerskatebord

thumb_up thumb_down -606

Super speed, but with super clumsiness

thumb_up thumb_down +115

The Power To Have Lazer Eyes Everytime You Sleep.

thumb_up thumb_down -196

Telekinetic power over styrofoam

thumb_up thumb_down +42

The power to be a MISSERABLE PILE OF SECRETS! BUT ENOUGH TALK (glass breaks) HAVE AT YOU! Moral: More are gonna get this one than those below, this one is merely a quote rather than cerebral. But you can always pretend to understand it by thumbing it up, or down if you just fail at understanding, either way is fine.

thumb_up thumb_down -72

the power to see 3 seconds into the past.

thumb_up thumb_down +143

The power to talk to talking animals.

thumb_up thumb_down +172

The power of dying whenever you want.

thumb_up thumb_down +50

The power to make your nipples hurt when you twist them

thumb_up thumb_down +94

the power to lick your own tongue

thumb_up thumb_down +100

The power to pass incredibly powerful gas at the most inconvenient of times

thumb_up thumb_down -229

The power to mind reeds

thumb_up thumb_down +112

the power to see through bananas

thumb_up thumb_down +41

The power to piss lava.

thumb_up thumb_down -104

The ability to hand in assignments 1 day late

thumb_up thumb_down +139

The power to make a camera appear when someone does something stupid.

thumb_up thumb_down -25

The ability to control the internet

thumb_up thumb_down +124

The power to piss in a toilet when your drunk

thumb_up thumb_down +143

The power spite flower

thumb_up thumb_down +35

Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!