The power to understand animals but only extinct animals

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The power to smell like poop once every hour.

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The power to believe I type actual morals. Moral: At horsehead network? Now please go look for prostitutes at a church or astronauts under the sea you fucklng ass and blahblah!

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The ability to say "MISSING FINGERS" on Shitbrix.com

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The power to initiate hiccoughing at will.

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The ability to dissolve your own organs. They don't grow back, either.

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the power to see the present.

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The ability to do arithmetic one year after 1st grade.

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The power to hold your fart unless people are around you

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the ability to turn into random hats

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The power to cook eggs but only if they are already cooked and only by burping on them to warm them up.

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The power to instantly become pregnant

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hey

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the ability to give a potato an orgasm

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The ability to open electronics-packaging without scissors.

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The power to type some incredibly perverted "superpowers" and get a boner while laughing so loud the neighbors on both sides of your apartment closed their windows.

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The power to have sex with jessica alba Only if you have Sex with Rosie O'Donnell with a ten inch penis

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the power of spontaneous combustion but only when you get an erection

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The power to have a normal sized torso, but short legs.

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The power to misspell when tyring to spell qukcily

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The power to manage Chelsea FC

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The power to grab a cats face

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The power to change the channel without a remote, but only but only if you're holding the remote.

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The power to see where light is not present.

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!