the power to be able to touch MC Hammer

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The power to get 100% on every test but get caught for cheating.

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the power to be able to find you pointless super power post after its been posted to check on popularity

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The ability of telepathy but only when your targets are toast pieces, not whole toast mind you, toast pieces. This includes crumbs

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the power to lick your own tongue

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being black

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The power to wipe ur ass without the need of toilet paper

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Having the ability to get Bulimia by looking at yourself in the mirror.

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The power to die, but only when you're dead.

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The power to run at the speed of invisibility.

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the power to create your own real working money but you cannot spend it

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the power to sleep while standing!

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the power to stop time for everything... including yourself

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the power to turn food into shit

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the power to glow fainlty in broad daylight

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The ability to attract black people.

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The power to move at the speed of ripeness. Moral: Ripeness is actually slightly slower than time, true fact.

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The power to be able to make your least favorite food or drink, but you cannot eat it and it only technically exists if you don't look at it.

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Power to develop diseases.

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The ability to talk to deer, only while riding one.

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The power to kill an ant!!!

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The power to communicate with inter-dimensional beings, but they're reeeeally annoying.

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The power to tell what a person has eaten by the smell of their farts

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The ability to teleport, but only in compete darkness.

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!