The power to read thoughts but it reads everyones thoughts at the same time and you can't decipher whose thought is whose

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The power of night vision only when you are carrying a flashlight that is turned on.

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The power to shapeshift, but only when below ground.

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The power to kick ass and chew bubblegum but be all out of kicks. "sits down chews bubblegum"

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the power to waste time doing stupid stuff like reading this.

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The ability to fart inwards.

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The power to send emails via pigeon

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To be waterproof but only when your not wet

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The power to time travel only a Planck second into the future.

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To have your speed, strength, reflexes and senses heightened to the level of whatever is appropriate in your situation.

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The power to not be able to reach the top shelf.

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The power to predict the past.

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The ability to kick in a three point shot but only during a game.

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The power to sleep but only when its past midnight

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The ability to stop and keep people from sneezing.

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The Power to look mildly far away but only with something on your face to help you see

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The power to create little lightning bolts, but only by peeing on a electrical device, you can create little tiny lightning bolts.

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The power to make your hair turn green but only if you are holding green hair dye and when you use the power the green hair dye goes away

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Clairvoyance, but only when your mothers having intimacy with your dad.

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The power to look into cheese.

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The power to understand math.

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The power to know when someone around you is about to sneeze but not the specific person

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MARIAN PRICE ISN'T DEAD BUT SOME SAY SHE'S DEAD INSIDE

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The power to barely touch anything in space and time, but only with the pointer finger on your not dominant hand.

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!