- Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!

The power to shoot several liters of blood out of you`re nose at high speed at will.

The power to move at the speed of ripeness. Moral: Ripeness is actually slightly slower than time, true fact.

the power to turn retarted

The power to extend your pinky toe

The power to hear people's thoughts when you fap

the power to jump like a black guy.

The power to become mentally retarded only when you get an erection.

the power to take ipecac without throwing up

the power to hold your breath 0.01 seconds longer than the average human

The power to make dead batteries appear.

the ability to add edges to any circle on anything that you can write on

the power to emit air through your mouth and nose.....

The power of fork-throwing. This includes large pie servers, spoons, and basically any other utensils that are not knives.

the power to get drunk you are needed

Power to sleep without eyelids

The ability to police irony

the power to make faces at the blind

I have the power to force farts out of my ass.

The power to make Q-Tips rain from the sky every month

The power of hindsight

The ability to pull open push only doors

The power to be afraid of horses.

the superpower of making pointless and lame jokes for which no human laughs (except crazy ones and apes)

The power to open doors the opposite way they were made to open.

Pointless Super Powers