the power to laugh at burials and cry at weddings

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The power to laught at Tyler Perry's House of Payne

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The power to breath under water, while your in a submarine.

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The "helpers" you call during emergencies when they where new and a itsy bit unorganized... misunderstandings easily showed up part 1: The Firemen: Why the hell did you call us if this place is already on fire? Call the damn Watermen THEN! The Watermen: Sorry we only receive calls and help people that are drowning, try the Firemen or something... The Cops: Crime in the city? Sorry our work is to COP OUT of stuff, Try the Police or something...

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The power to uncontrollably say "thats what she said" whenever it is possible, even if its really shitty

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The power to see oxygen.

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The power to smell water.

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The power to shoot glue from your penis

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the power to shoot fireballs.....only when your under water

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The ability to break every bone in your body every second, then have super speed. You wouldn't be able to run.

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Super empathy! The power to feel the suffering of every living being...

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The power to predict the present

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The power to be gay on command.

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The ability to make yourself rich unless you are using it on yourself...

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The power to write pointless superpowers

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The power to go back in time, but only as Anne Frank during the Holocaust.

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the power to refreeze frozen ice

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The power to be able to taste shit from miles away.

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To Turn Thin To Macho but only in left arm

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The power to see 1 plank length farther then most normal people

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The power to only be obesely fat.

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the power to make rotten food go good again, but only if it's exactly 2 months, 4 days, 9 hours and 13 minutes old.

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The power to give people std's during intercourse

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The ability to go blind every time you open your eyes

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!