the power to hold your breath 0.01 seconds longer than the average human

The power to make dead batteries appear.

the power to enter a coma.

The ability to shoot a banana from your eyebrow every time you are riding on a unicycle.

The power to die,but only if your alive!

The power to make YouTube subscribers disappear.

the power to be physically attracted to the same sex

The power to be on mars. Not survive, not go between mars and earth. You could just instantaneously be on mars, then probably die.

The power to know when a painting is crooked but it only works if the painting is noticeably crooked.

The power to finish right before you start (If you know what I mean)

the power to get a massive headache whenever you look at toast

the power to summon a pen, once

the power to shrink 0.1 millimeter or grow 0.1 millimeter

The power to grow more genitals.

The ability to turn into a melting crayon for $20

the power to make plants grow at a slightly excelled rate when lying on top of them .... you also smell like shit, all the time.

the ability to stop time on your watch, wall clocks, and everything that runs on battery.

The power to vomit every time you burp.

The power to be the most beautiful thing ever unless someone watches you.

The power to have a pointless superpower and after realizing that it's pointless

Most of Gods powers part 2: Let us pretend that God really created everything... including sin right? God: Jebus, I want you to go down to earth and receive torture of legendary proportions, and die. Jebus: Why? God: To remove sin... Jebus: Uh... cant you just remove it? God replies either: 1. Yeah but ill be more fun this way, ill have you killed just to show you are not mortal anyways lol troll! 2. No, Sin is more powerful than me, so you better go die to not really die, relax... 3. Son, my ways are mysterious, "thunderstorm scares Jebus to go down) Moral disclaimer: God can be anyone`s God, and Jebus is not to be confused with the completely different Jesus. I mean every God out there and Jebus is simply a name I put instead of whoever prophet your religion has, so I really insulted everyone religious. Moral: (the other was a disclaimer) Religion is written by men... drunk men... now go eat your bread and drink your wine... and you shall become like Jebus... tortured and crucified? To show the world you are immortal? Side effects: Alcholism and all that follows, including a quicker death... to prove your immortality? (Hypnosis is powerful shit, especially when you are drunk, take it from a experienced hypnotist)

the powers to be a fat gassy woman

power to drop the soap in the jail shower room

The power to turn water into wine.

Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!