The power to see through glass

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The power to become a fish for 10 hours on dry land

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The ability to talk to deer, only while riding one.

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the power to cook sandwiches when married

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the power to put paper to your nose and blow strange liqeud type substance into it.

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what do you call someone who never says hello............................ a shy person

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The power to turn into a tree.

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Ability to emit a low-level light, but only when standing near a candle.

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To be able to commit a sexual offense but never get away with it

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The power to know the word for potato in every human language... including binary (011100000110111101110100011000010111010001101111)

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The power to cry sulfuric acid.

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The power to torture yourself and you are also immortal but will immediately die if you are not constantly tortured in a way that is 100000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000 times worse then you can even imagine and are so terrified of dying that you would rather be tortured for all eternity.

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The power to be any animal you want, but only if you are that specific animal that you want to be.

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the power to stand straight but only when you bend over

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the power to talk to people off long distances,but only with communicational devices.

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The ability to turn into a slightly damp sponge

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The power to get cancer all the time. And strokes.

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The power to sit on a pile of change and add it up.

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The Power To Fly Without control

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The power to blink, but only if polline gets in your eye.

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The power to wake up every morning in a corn field 36miles away from home

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The power to find any film directed by Uwe Boll entertaining.

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Shoppers today in the mattress department we just started a great promotion.

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THE SUPER FRIENDS HEROES LEAGUE OF SUPER HEROES OF LESSER USEFUL HEROES! KNIGHT FARTSALOT!: Fear my methane! You and me in one small room for 3 days and you will faint for sure! Uncle Diabeetush: Save their parents Captain! Ill take care of their children! Captain Novolin: I have great sugar level control! Help me! Evil Mistress Sugarpie is too sweet! Runald MagnifiCient Donalds: HAMBARGAR HAMBARGAR HAMBARGAR WOOOOO! I keep American people from starvation! Remember kids less than 250 pounds counts as starvation! And their LEADER... MORAL MAN!: The hell am I introducing myself here for? Damn you Subconscious! How can you expect people to understand my genius of putting myself here! They are morons! Oh... hi everybody.. wazzup?

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!