The power to fall asleep each time you

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The power to vomit every time you burp.

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the power to fax people with your mind

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The ability to telekinetically form crop circles in your own pubic hair.

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The ability to cure polio, but only within U.S. borders.

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to eat a pie and get to fart an apple (cus why not)

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The power to teleport 13,000,000,000 lightyears but not be able to return.

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The power to have some fucking muslim (white guy, no arab) tell my wife that since we have been married for three years and I Speak spanish/Russian/Japanse/Itali... Anyways that she should at least be able to speak fluently spanish so shame on her. (The fuck I be teaching her spanish in Norway?) The power? To tell my wife that if I ever see him, I will chop his head off... My wife said I think he meant it well, I said, so do I. The reason its useless? My wife refused so I had to enter their stupid meeting room and tell him myself... He asked me who I was while shivering, my answer: Want to learn how to speak motherdfucking spanish? He supposedly spent staring down the floor for hours while refusing his boss`s offer to call the cops on me and told my wife to tell me he was sorry. I goddamn bet he is fucking sorry! Nero: Now and forever.

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the power to get F's on assignments without trying

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The ability to build a wall... wait a minute!

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The power to control the weather, but only in space

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the power to be 100% pointless

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the power to melt your bones

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The power of tasting irresistibly delishush whenever anyone gets hungry.

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boo

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The power to make a woman be quiet but only during sex.

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The power to fly really fast but only in closets.

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The power to revive people, however it only works on people who commit genocide.

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The power to be the best video game player ever but you have squeakers follow you everywhere calling you a hacker and saying there going to report you

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the power to be like charlie sheen and relize that my score is 0

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the power to pre-tend your a animal ...

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The power to hover a milimeter off solid ground when performing a walking motion.

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the power to kill your self when you are not under any stress

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The ability to dehydrate yourself at will.

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!