the power to extend commercial time while your in the bathroom

To be able to generate cancer at will

The power of omnipotence and omniscience but you work in such mysterious ways that youre both invisible and intangible and without will to do skwat. Oh wait that sounds like...

The power to uncontrollably fart when your with your girlfriend

the power to break the nib of a pencil so that its pointless

The power to completely understand Monty Python sketches.

The power think five times slower.

The power to fuck any person of the opposite sex, but you're incredibly gay.

The power to die every time you are standing on something.

The power to die at will

The ability to pull Bleach Flavored lighter fluid out of your ass every time you see a modern feminist or a Jacob Satorious video

The power uncontrollably self destruct when you feel safe.

The power to make anyone you see look surprise.

power to age faster

The ability to look at someone and die.

The power to pronounce the word "rural."

the power to sleep with any woman, unless your a man

The power grow arm pit hair 5 times faster and 5 times longer than it was after shaving.

The power to be really offensive after you finished a sentence U FUKING JAP

The power to cause weeds to grow twice as fast as usual in your bed of prized petunias.

----the power to hold your breath until your die-----

teh pwoer 2 rite liek dis!!!11!1!111!!!! ex dee

The power to stand up and do what's right, save people, restore order, preserve life, maintain balance and create peace but the lack of motivation to do so.

the power to predict what you are going to post on facebook

Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!