- Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!

the power to disappear up your own asshole

The power to get arrested

The ability to headbutt yourself in the face.

The power to date women if they say 'Yes' when you ask if they want to date.

The power to not have a superpower

the power to give yourself cancer that you can't get rid of

The power to make your left hand glow whenever you put your right hand up your ass.

The power to bleed for 3-7 days for a week every month, and still live..

the power to see everything as if it were a 1 year olds dralling.

the power to poo out of your eyeballs and they burn when you do it

The Power to Read really Small Words

The power think five times slower.

the ability to walk barefooted on top of legos without pain but only as long as you don't know they're legos

to zap people but only yourself

The ability to spit mouthwash

The power to sneeze out of your mouth and cough out of your nose.

The power of becoming an apple tree

the power to fall at 9.9m per second.

the power to shoot fireballs only when your underwater

The power to hurt other people by hurting yourself, and you both sustain the damage.

The ability to understand everything about a language after 100 years of intense studying when you could be doing something more interesting.

The ability to recall lyrics of particularly terrible music with perfect accuracy.

The ability to pee while standing up for men

The power to transform into a paralysed turtle with half its shell missing

Pointless Super Powers