THE SUPER FRIENDS HEROES LEAGUE OF SUPER HEROES OF LESSER USEFUL HEROES! KNIGHT FARTSALOT!: Fear my methane! You and me in one small room for 3 days and you will faint for sure! Uncle Diabeetush: Save their parents Captain! Ill take care of their children! Captain Novolin: I have great sugar level control! Help me! Evil Mistress Sugarpie is too sweet! Runald MagnifiCient Donalds: HAMBARGAR HAMBARGAR HAMBARGAR WOOOOO! I keep American people from starvation! Remember kids less than 250 pounds counts as starvation! And their LEADER... MORAL MAN!: The hell am I introducing myself here for? Damn you Subconscious! How can you expect people to understand my genius of putting myself here! They are morons! Oh... hi everybody.. wazzup?

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Super speed, but with super clumsiness

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The power to look at someone and imaginatively initiate intercourse in the most unreasonable way possible.

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the power to turn a dollar into 99 cents

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The power to have all of your genes inherited from your parents

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The power to be oppressed by everything

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The ability to have A's in all your classes, but only if you already have A's in all your classes.

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The power to make money appear, but only when you don't want or need anything

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The power to communicate with dust bunnies.

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The power to sneeze whenever you think about apples.

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The power to see through windows

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Supreme pre-mature ejaculation.

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The power to sharpen mechanical pencils and pens.

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The power to fall down stairs sooner than you should have.

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The power to stop moral man from writing morals under every comment... Moral: The damn CIA cant go trough my battlestation, because I use this computer via proxy and can change my IP at will, so you literally would have to blow up the anti-bomb shelters in Micronesia and thus kill a key element of the pirate bay... And who would want that... buy your own music and movies? Download your own games? YOU THINK YOU HAVE THAT LUXURY? YOU CANT HANDLE THE TRUTH!

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The power to divide by zero

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The power to stop a bullet from hitting someone you care about, once.

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The Power To Make Justin Bieber.

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The power to shoot liqiud gold ever 3-6 years only when you come across jesus.

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The power to be first on any form of media (youtube powers).

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The power to impress a mentally disabled person by doing absolutely nothing

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That F-ucking ass hole that keeps typing morals all the time, he is F`n annoying! Moral: You thought I was a hater eh? Hahaha got you there ;) And if that is not the most pointless pointlessity in the world, then... I give shit about thumbs ups really, they just discovered that I have an bad allergy to dust, and thus I have been unable to work out for TWO YEARS! WOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOT! Me so happy, me love you long time. That is what women usually say to me, instead that they change the happy with horny... and replace you with someone else`s name. Self Irony... such a delight... and maybe I am lying... who knows... who wants to know? Nobody? :( sob... excellent! :D Damn CATCHPHRA! I SWEAR I USED TO HAVE A KITTEN THAT WAS TWICE THE SIZE OF TEXAS!

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The ability to jump 8 feet fences

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The power to smell feces from a mile away.

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!