- Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!

the ability to talk to humans

The power to find your lost keys only if the keys are in your pocket.

The power to skid against the ground at 45 mph

the power to turn everthing you touch into to some form of pork but you are an orthodox jew

The power to not respond to gravity (only when you're in space).

The power to bleed anally at will

The power to stop a bullet from hitting someone you care about, once.

The power to be invisible but only in the dark.

The power to read 20 pages of pointless superpowers, but only during science class

The power to have your mother suck your dick dry as long as there is any sperm in your balls.

The power to clone yourself, except all your clones become Catholic priests. Moral: "Mommy! It was HE who touched me!"

the power to extend commercial time while your in the bathroom

The power to know what you're going to have for dinner on any given day 10 years from now.

The power to drink as much tequila as you want without dying.

the power to inhale and exhale air

The power to ride a unicorn without a horn that can't fly.

The power to breath Oxygen

The power to be Chuck Norris

the power to make an earthquake that an ant can not even feel

The power to live in lava, but only when your cold

The power to teleport but you must have walked to that place within the last attosecond

The power to be invisible, but only when no one's looking.

The power to explode the entire world every time you became happy.

The power to know everything, but then forget every 7 seconds

Pointless Super Powers